This has caused so much pain, confusion and disappointment in my life. I sure this is one of the reason God wants us to avoid it. He want us to make sure we have a commitment first. It so easy to ASSUME that because you are together that you will stay together(and I know this is why the institution of marriage has a bad name right now in time, but I think that is changing)
I guess what I am look for is other women’s stories on their struggles. I want to know their experiences of how they dealt with their bad choices. Because what I am going through is very personal and I wish I could talk with some one else.]]>
Kurt, I nominate you for the quote-of-the-month award.]]>
Being married is difficult and requires a lot of work, self-sacrifice, and spiritual and emotional intimacy in order for it to be long-lasting and constructive. Starting a relationship based on the intermingling of high-powered mind-disabling hormones and superficial appearances does absolutely nothing to foster emotional or spiritual intimacy, and it fosters selfishness, not selflesness. That undercuts a marriage, or any relationship, right from the start.
Its like building a house on a foundation of lingerie.]]>
BTW, while I distanced myself from the church during/after my post mission fall from grace, I knew some couples who were banging before temple marriage. Wasn’t my thing, but it happened.]]>
It’s true, sex presents a risk of pregnancy, in MOST cases. Some are sterile. Some are too old. Not only that, but I don’t think we are too far from fool proof birth control. What then?
It also remains very unclear why a committed relationship necessitates marriage. Why must it be committed for life? Why not simply committed as in being exclusive?
Your arguments present a decent case for why fornication CAN be bad, but it fails to address the issue of why it IS bad. Clearly the church considers Ned’s pre marital activities to be evil (sorry about that Ned), and yet his case doesn’t fall under your description at all. Not only that, but some people could extend your arguments to kissing or even dating. Maybe it would be best if we simply didn’t have any emotions at all. I know this isn’t what you are saying, but you are pointed in that direction. We say, let your heart (emotions) guide you to truth, unless we are talking about something we consider bad (like sex). Such a position fails to address why premarital sex is bad.]]>
When we fornicate we interfere with that decision making process. Fornicating can easily cause someone to fall hopelessly in love with the wrong person. I know this by sad experience.
The act of putting together an eternal marriage is of unthinkably great importance. It doesn’t just affect the present. It has eternal ramifications that can ultimately impact thousands or even millions of descendants.
Nothing could be more foolish, or have longer lasting, negative, eternal consequences than marrying the wrong person because of a lack of sexual self-discipline.
Bsides, even if a fornicator lucks out and marries the right person, a lack of sexual self-discipline enormously increases the risk that it will cause a divorce. Even worse than marrying the wrong person, is marrying the right person and then getting a divorce.
I think the problem with fornication is the eternal ramifications.]]>