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Nine Moons » Blog Archive : The Top Five Most Embarrassingly Mormon Ways of Meeting Your Spouse » The Top Five Most Embarrassingly Mormon Ways of Meeting Your Spouse

The Top Five Most Embarrassingly Mormon Ways of Meeting Your Spouse

Tom - May 22, 2007

5. On a singles ward pioneer trek
4. Through a hometeaching assignment
3. Serving together as missionaries
2. Tunnel singing/temple singing***
1. Someone you taught and baptized on your mission

If #1 is you, consider making up a different story to tell people about how you met your spouse.

As far as I know, there hasn’t been a “Bloggernacle” marriage. The day that happens, there will be a new number 1 on this list, which will bump mine and my wife’s embarrassingly Mormon way of meeting off the list.

Perhaps worse than having met your spouse in one of these embarrassingly Mormon ways would be having gotten engaged and married embarrassingly quickly. I’m not going to tell you how long my wife and I were dating before we got engaged. It’s too embarrassing.

***This is the kind of thing that makes it hard to be a Utah Mormon. Tunnel singing is where a bunch of adolescents go to the tunnels on BYU campus on Sunday afternoons/evenings and sing hymns (and make out). Temple singing is kind of the goody goody spinoff of tunnel singing: groups of adolescents go to temple grounds on Sunday afternoons and sing hymns and don’t make out, as far as I know. It must be said that I never participated in either of these events and I made fun of anybody who did; and if you did you should be embarrassed.

57 Comments »

  1. Tom, I commend you for “making fun of anybody who did.”

    I’ve done many embarrassing things in my life. One of them is mis-spelling the word “embarrass.” I can never figure out how to spell it (one “r” or two?) – so I have to look it up – every single time.

    Comment by danithew — May 22, 2007 @ 6:48 am

  2. In fact the word appears on at least one list of the 100 most commonly misspelled words of all time.

    As if you needed any further confirmation that I am a complete and total nerd …

    Comment by danithew — May 22, 2007 @ 6:51 am

  3. Danithew, I notice that “misspell” (into which you inserted a phantom hyphen) also makes the misspelled words list.

    I have my own short list of words I have to go look up every single time: tomorrow; hierarchy; embarrass. I think blogging is good for spelling … in the long run.

    Comment by Dave — May 22, 2007 @ 7:01 am

  4. um, try these:

    1. Getting sent home from your mission for getting (now your) spouse pregnent/getting pregnant. (pre-mission is about the same)
    2. Met your current spouse in a ppi with a member of the bishopric.
    3. Met Spouse the one time you broke the word of wisdom and broke law of chastity…
    4. Spouse told you God said you had to marry them and you listened (but didn’t want to marry them).
    5. You were your spouses primary teacher…

    Comment by Matt W. — May 22, 2007 @ 7:02 am

  5. I knew my husband in high school. I wasn’t Mormon when we started dating. He was planning on going on a mission at the time. He baptized and married me instead.

    Comment by Susan M — May 22, 2007 @ 7:04 am

  6. Embarass is one of the least embarrassing words to misspell, I think. What might be more embarrassing is misspelling a word when you’re pointing out a misspell.

    Comment by Tom — May 22, 2007 @ 7:06 am

  7. Baptizing and then marrying someone while you’re a civilian isn’t an embarrassingly Mormon way of meeting your spouse. That’s a cool Mormon way. It’s only embarrassingly Mormon when you do it as a missionary.

    Comment by Tom — May 22, 2007 @ 7:08 am

  8. Susan M, that’s not embarrassing, that’s awesome.

    Comment by Matt W. — May 22, 2007 @ 7:09 am

  9. Matt W.,
    Your 1, 3, and 4 are shameful more than embarrassing. I consider the others and the ones on my list funny/quirky and uniquely Mormon; things not to be ashamed of, but slightly embarrassing to admit to.

    Comment by Tom — May 22, 2007 @ 7:12 am

  10. I should say that I noticed misspell was on the list – but I thought pointing out would just make my ridiculous point even more obnoxious.

    I wasn’t just nit-picking – I have had to look up the word embarrass almost every time I’ve written it … maybe this post and writing comments will help cure me of the problem.

    Comment by danithew — May 22, 2007 @ 7:13 am

  11. I actually appreciate the correction, danithew. I think I will never misspell either embarrass or misspell again, thanks to you.

    Comment by Tom — May 22, 2007 @ 7:16 am

  12. A friend of mine met his wife at the Green and Gold Ball; that always makes me laugh. Of course, we qualify for #4 on Tom’s list.

    Comment by Norbert — May 22, 2007 @ 7:47 am

  13. Hey, my wife is my greenie’s sister, though I never knew she existed until after the mission, so I’m not embarrassed at all.

    And Tom, I’d have to say that the embarrassment factor raises even higher for your #1 if you served in a foreign mission where the population is clamoring to become U.S. citizens.

    Comment by Rusty — May 22, 2007 @ 7:52 am

  14. Tunnel singing. I’d forgotten about that. A bunch of my friends (not me) went streaking through there one Sunday night just to shock everyone.

    Me, my wife was the FHE “mom” and I hit on her and charmed her away.

    Comment by clark — May 22, 2007 @ 8:55 am

  15. One time my cohorts and I filled up trash cans with water from the Heritage Halls moat (fuh-reezing water!) and did a drive by dumping onto the poor tunnel-singing saps who couldn’t fit inside the tunnel since there were so many people.

    Little did we know that several of the people we soaked lived in our own dormitory building.

    Oh, the good ol’ days…

    Comment by Connor — May 22, 2007 @ 9:13 am

  16. danithew,

    Firefox has built in spell checking. It will save your life.

    Connor,

    Did any of them beat down your door after you did that?

    Comment by a random John — May 22, 2007 @ 9:19 am

  17. My sister used to refer to dating within BYU family home evening groups as “incest.”

    Comment by danithew — May 22, 2007 @ 9:21 am

  18. I would include FHE. (I met my wife through FHE in my Ricks College ward, but I am not actually too embarrassed about it…) But FHE groups are one of those uniquely mormon ways of meeting a spouse.

    Comment by Jordan — May 22, 2007 @ 9:29 am

  19. Did any of them beat down your door after you did that?

    Luckily, our devilish undertaking went undetected. We watched them return to their apartments, dripping with water, through the peephole in our door.

    Oh, the guilt!

    Comment by Connor — May 22, 2007 @ 9:34 am

  20. Jordan,
    Yeah, FHE is definitely a top ten.

    I wouldn’t consider any of these too embarassing, except maybe #1. They’re just so very uniquely and typically Mormon that it’s something people laugh at when they find out that’s how you met.

    In fact, at Rusty’s party someone laughed at me for having met my wife on a pioneer trek.

    Comment by Tom — May 22, 2007 @ 9:43 am

  21. What about working together on BYU campus? (like me)
    or because he was your boyfriend’s MTC companion? (a friend)

    Okay, the pioneer trek stuff is only funny now because of the LDS indie “Pride and Prejudice”.

    Oh, and I did get water balloons thrown at me while tunnel singing.

    Comment by Cheryl — May 22, 2007 @ 10:33 am

  22. Cheryl,
    Brave of you to admit to tunnel singing after I sneered at it. Some of my best friends tunnel sang, so you’re in good company. Nerdy company, but good. :-)

    Comment by Tom — May 22, 2007 @ 10:37 am

  23. Pioneer Trek – sounds like a television show waiting to happen. A cross between Star Trek and Little House on the Prairie.

    Comment by danithew — May 22, 2007 @ 10:43 am

  24. I married someone from my mission. Eight years later.

    Comment by Peter LLC — May 22, 2007 @ 10:50 am

  25. I’m a nerdy Molly Mormon, and I’m not afraid to admit it. ;)

    Comment by Cheryl — May 22, 2007 @ 11:02 am

  26. I suppose that, by your criteria Tom, I ought to be embarrassed about meeting my wife while we were both on the staff of Aspen Grove (BYU’s alumni camp near Sundance). Not only that, but I was set up by the other girls on the staff.

    But I’m not.

    I guess I’m just glad to be married, and happily so.

    Comment by Seth R. — May 22, 2007 @ 11:04 am

  27. And we started dating June of 1999, were engaged by February of 2000, and married that April.

    Dear me. How will I ever live it down?

    Comment by Seth R. — May 22, 2007 @ 11:07 am

  28. Ooh, oooh! And his wife went tunnel singing with me the year before!

    Comment by Cheryl — May 22, 2007 @ 11:16 am

  29. Seth,
    Nah, that’s not a particularly quirky/typical Mormon way of meeting. That wouldn’t make the list. Now, if you were both EFY counselors, that would make the cut.

    I wouldn’t say that I’m really embarrassed about how my wife and I met. But it’s so very Mormon that it gets a laugh when people find out.

    And your time to engagement is an eternity compared to some people I might know.

    Comment by Tom — May 22, 2007 @ 11:16 am

  30. Actually, Seth, Brandon and I have you on that one –May to January (met to married).

    Comment by Cheryl — May 22, 2007 @ 11:17 am

  31. Met my wife at the BYU Bookstore. Met Oct. married in January.

    It usually takes 12 -16 weeks to order a wedding dress at our store….Mormon engagements make it difficult and different than the real world to deal with. We do have our own unqiue culture….great isn’t it?!

    Comment by Don Clifton — May 22, 2007 @ 11:47 am

  32. Holy crap, I forgot that you met in October. Wow, 37 years and six kids later and still together. Good thing she didn’t marry Leather Jacket.

    Comment by Rusty — May 22, 2007 @ 11:51 am

  33. My husband and I started dating June 4 (my birthday) and got married February 4.

    Comment by Susan M — May 22, 2007 @ 11:55 am

  34. My best friend was his wife’s zone leader. Once while playing Ultimate Frisbee on P-day, they both jumped after the frisbee and got all tangled up, resulting in her falling on him, with brief lip contact on his face as they gracefully fell to the ground.

    And the rest, as they say, is history.

    Comment by Connor — May 22, 2007 @ 12:22 pm

  35. My parents met when they were in the same FHE group. It creeps me out a little when my Mom mentions the roommate my dad first dated as my “almost Mom.”

    Comment by a spectator — May 22, 2007 @ 12:39 pm

  36. How about sister of the stake missionaries who taught you the discussions, and friend of the friend (who were in an arrangement living with each others parents to save on college housing costs) who introduced you to the church in college? That’s how my parents met up.

    Comment by onelowerlight — May 22, 2007 @ 12:43 pm

  37. Tom, you may gasp when you see this. You may be thinking…. NOOOOOOOOOOO, she wouldn’t dare tell my fellow bloggernerds that we were oh so embarrasingly married less than 4 months from the time we first met.
    Oops, guess I just did. :)
    But I’m not embarrased. It was right and we both knew it. Just be grateful I don’t tell them when we set the temple date.
    With love, your very mischevious wife.

    Comment by Tom — May 22, 2007 @ 12:45 pm

  38. Oh man. I’m blushing already.

    Including myself, four out of six generations of Pratts have married a woman they met while on a mission. Parley started it. He met my 3rd g-grandma while in England with the rest of the 12. She became his 4th wife later, in Nauvoo.

    Great-grandpa and g-ma served together in the Mexican Mission, over which he presided later in life.

    My dad looked up Hermana Williams when he returned to BYU. He figured it would either be her or her roommate (and former companion). Well, my parents dated for 16 days before getting engaged. He talks about being whacked by a “spiritual 2×4.” Mom’s roommate married Dad’s former companion.

    As for me, I ran into Sister Stanger back at BYU. We went out first on a Friday late in September. Sunday night (after an amazing weekend spent largely together) I actually asked her,

    “Just supposing we continued to date and fell in love, and we wanted to marry, when would we?”

    We tied my parents for a 16-day courtship (as if they could complain), and were married in December.

    It was awesome. Still is, 5.5 years later…

    Comment by mistaben — May 22, 2007 @ 2:17 pm

  39. Okay Tom – out with it. How soon did you set the temple date after you met each other? :mrgreen:

    Comment by danithew — May 22, 2007 @ 2:21 pm

  40. I don’t know who #37 is, but it’s not my wife. My wife loves me too much to do something like that.

    I think the facts are wrong anyways. I’m sure we must’ve known each other for much longer than that before we got married.

    Comment by Tom — May 22, 2007 @ 2:32 pm

  41. I grew up in Utah, but went to a Presbyterian-affiliated college on the East Coast specifically to avoid the clichéd fate of having my home teacher marry my roommate.

    A year later, my roommate joined the church (baptized by my home teacher). Six months after that, they were married.

    There’s no escaping destiny, I tell you!

    (I met my own DH years later at an Institute class in the Midwest. Another fine cliché, but does that count as embarrassing?)

    Comment by RCH — May 22, 2007 @ 4:09 pm

  42. Tom,

    I hate to say it but your #11 might have been a bit hasty (see #20, #37).

    I won’t tell you how I met my wife other than to say it is not in your list, but it has come up in the comments. It’s a bit too embarrassing to own up to directly. Ditto for how long I was dating before I got engaged. Reckless.

    Comment by Jacob J — May 22, 2007 @ 6:20 pm

  43. To all of us that shudder when we think about how short our courtships were: Isn’t it crazy we think our courtships were so short? Back then all we needed was the guidance of the Spirit –now I see people getting hitched at 19 years old (21 for the guy) after 3 months of dating and I think they’re nutso! Classic case of “it was okay for me, but for you? Well…”

    Comment by Cheryl — May 22, 2007 @ 6:35 pm

  44. Jacob,
    If you tell, I’ll tell.

    And yeah, I noticed a few more misspells. I have editing power, but I figure I’ll leave them as a testament to the perils of speaking too soon. I haven’t misspelled misspell yet, though.

    Cheryl,
    Yeah, anytime I hear about a quick engagement I just think these kids have no idea what they’re doing. And looking back, I didn’t know exactly what I was doing, either. But it felt right and everything that has happened since have confirmed that it was right.

    Comment by Tom — May 22, 2007 @ 7:05 pm

  45. Well, it’s official. I am now 100% certain that I know who “Cheryl” is. I suspected it a few posts back when she was dropping hints.

    We were all on the Aspen Grove staff at the same time. Cheryl and Brandon were already married by then and seemed to enjoy playing the meddling married couple trying to get me and Misty to hook up. Misty, incidentally, witnessed most of their courtship while they were all on the staff of Helaman Halls. She says she was there the day they first met and by evening it was already pretty obvious where things were going.

    Cheryl’s husband Brandon and I both worked on the climbing wall and he was quite helpful as a sort-of dating counselor (seeing as I never “dated” anyone before Misty – another embarrassing admission). Brandon had already pegged me as a good match for Misty before she was even interested in me (and before I had even noticed her).

    Personally, I think everyone could use a good match-maker Thanks Cheryl and Brandon!

    Comment by Seth R. — May 22, 2007 @ 8:38 pm

  46. You are most certainly welcome! I just wish we could see you guys more often. What has it been, 5 years?

    Comment by Cheryl — May 23, 2007 @ 7:27 am

  47. Hey, Rusty-
    I’ve decided that your blog is awesome. Because of it, I have reconnected with Seth and Misty and your sister Amy. So, hooray for Nine Moons! Bringing lost friends together. (Even though it takes Seth five months to figure it out). :)

    Comment by Cheryl — May 23, 2007 @ 2:57 pm

  48. Jacob J.,

    Mwah-ha-ha-ha. Don’t forget that there is a certain person in the bloggernacle who was taking Gemology with your now-wife when the two of you got engaged…I won’t blow your secret, but I’m still a little bitter about S. marrying you instead of doing field camp with me that spring!

    As for me, my husband and I met six years before we married. Of course, that awesome accomplishment is somewhat marred by the embarrassing fact that we met in our Freshman Orientation Group, on the second day of college. And we went tunnel singing a lot our freshman year–and I’m not even ashamed!

    Comment by Keryn — May 23, 2007 @ 3:26 pm

  49. A couple obvious ways that were overlooked:

    LDSSingles.com
    LDSMingle.com
    LDSHearts.com
    HotSaints.com

    Fess up all you Mormon internet daters!

    Comment by Jon in Austin — May 23, 2007 @ 8:03 pm

  50. Keryn,

    Thanks for keeping my secret. I was nervous when your comment started with the “Mwah-ha-ha-ha.”

    Tom, you won’t have to tell if you wait for me to tell first.

    Comment by Jacob J — May 23, 2007 @ 9:35 pm

  51. How about “He was my Gospel Doctrine teacher”? In my last ward there were three couples who had met this way. BTW – This method provides a great opportunity to check out how your potential mate looks from behind (when they turn around to write on the chalkboard)!!

    Comment by Kat — May 24, 2007 @ 10:34 pm

  52. Let’s see how I stack up.

    I met my wife when she was serving as a missionary in my singles ward.

    We kept in some contact when she went home. She came to visit me six months later.

    We had never dated. I asked her to marry me on Jan 3rd. She said yes and went home to pack. One weeks later, she flew back up. We had one date on Jan 27th. We got married in the Boise Temple on February 8th.

    We’re happily married with 3 kids.

    All totally true. Take that!

    Comment by KyleM — May 25, 2007 @ 6:02 pm

  53. Oh, to add to the patheticness…

    I proposed using a scripture.

    Comment by KyleM — May 25, 2007 @ 6:16 pm

  54. and my wife and I were both 22 when I proposed.

    Comment by KyleM — May 25, 2007 @ 6:17 pm

  55. ???

    What age are sister missionaries allowed to serve again?

    Comment by Seth R. — May 25, 2007 @ 11:56 pm

  56. 21 for 18 months.

    Comment by KyleM — May 26, 2007 @ 8:34 am

  57. To address the implication of your question, she had a medical release.

    Comment by KyleM — May 26, 2007 @ 8:37 am

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