This post was inspired by what just happened to me 30 minutes ago on my way home from work. I saw the woman, started to get up and then took a second look and realized that she might not be pregnant. Not wanting to offend I looked around as if I saw someone I knew and then sat back down. Immediately the woman next to me got up and gave the pregnant woman her seat.
Just give your seat but don’t say it’s because you thought she was pregnant but because you’re a gentleman and she’s a woman. Worse case is she’s a feminist and calls you misogynist who thinks all women are weak. Then you could simply say, “not so, I’d hope you’d return the favor and offer me a set when I come in and you’d been riding. You know, like they taught about sharing in nursery?”
I never said anything to her but it was pretty obvious by the way that I stood up and looked at her that it was because I thought she was pregnant. But she’d be right in thinking that I’m a misogynist (seriously, how can you not hate women?)
Because if I gave up my seat for any standing woman then I would literally never sit down on the subway. Besides, women here have been liberated and lost their right to sit.
If I was pregnant and a man didn’t give up his seat, I do think I’d be offended. However, a nice man once tried to stop me from carrying something when I was almost 9 months pregnant and I snapped at him because I wanted to “go into labor.” So, honestly, Rusty, your title is RIGHT ON. When it comes to pregnant women, either way, you lose…
FWIW, when my wife was pregnant, she was exhausted and, as a general rule, only women got up on the subway to let her sit down. I understand that, if Rusty or I were to stand up for every woman on the subway, we’d never sit (so some days I do and some I don’t), but because of my wife’s exhaustion, even if it’s not clear whether she’s pregnant or fat, I err on the side of violently benevolent (or benevolently violent?) misogynism and stand up for the fat lady.
i once took a flight when i was obviously seven months pregnant. i had my carry-on luggage over my shoulder, a 15 month old on my hip, and i was lugging her enormous carseat over my head. every. single. passenger. sat and either stared at me or ignored me as i tried squeezing down the narrow aisle to my seat in the 21st row. i was so disappointed.